Which matters most – facts or feelings?
How do you deal with someone who disagrees with you?
Are you able to cope with multiple viewpoints?
Can you give someone else the credit?
Are you willing to change your mind?
Are there many pathways to your goal? (Bonus points if you have a goal!)
It costs a fortune to take time out and go to conferences, and other than having a blast with friends why go? Yes there are the presentations, the research papers, the innovations, and the crowded parties. Do you remember them all? I don't. So I don't do them (so go ahead and have all the fun without me). However I do remember the engaging conversations and learning through those one-on-one discussions about projects people are working on and their new book ideas - so do more of that. Seek out the great engaged conversations and the special interactions that matter.
It's easy to work lots of extra hours so that you reduce the number of tasks you have to do so that you are in control of everything and reduce your self-induced stress. But maybe sometimes it's good to feel a bit of stress to push us into a new way of thinking about how to approach things, to force ourselves to innovate, to free ourselves from the shackles of targeting reduced anxiety and forcing us onto a new and better approach.
I don't like the term "unskilled labour". It is the skills someone has that everyone possesses and is therefore devalued. Obviously skills matter - the more skills you have the higher you are likely to achieve. But unskilled still needs a re-brand.
Everyone is happier and more productive when they are trusted. It encourages co-operation between people and organisations. We like museums that let us stand near the artwork, police that don't stop and search us, restaurants that give us the bill at the end of the meal. But some companies cannot rely on trust and genuine good intentions. Banks must behave as is every transaction is a fraudulent one - it annoys us when our cards are stopped because of "unusual spending" but the banks know that people do get scammed and they behave accordingly. That trust / don't trust decision is something we all face every day. We automatically make assumptions about whether promises will be broken, how trustworthy a supplier is, how reliable the service will be. In every sector (apart from banking) it is probably better to trust than not to. You are more likely to get the result you need.
And isn't that all that matters? Being famous in your group or your tribe? I mean I know Andy Warhol predicted that everyone will have their 15 minutes of fame but what if we already do. Maybe just being known (and loved) by the people that matter most is, in the end, all that matters.
We all know that the best suppliers anticipate your needs before you are able to fully articulate them. It goes beyond putting yourself in the other person's shoes and walking around in them. Because you can never be them, you can only be you. So sometimes you need to drop your beliefs, expectations, and view of the world in order to know what is the best thing to do for your client. To understand where they are coming from and to make sure they get where they need to be.
Most people find it easy to make promises and less easy to keep them, and if you're not careful, it builds up against you. So the first thing to understand is what your promise actually is and why it is important. Once you understand your promise and know why your promise is important, you will not only work very hard to keep it, but it will go on to inspire just about every decision you make moving forward. Think about the places that you love to go to - the places you like to eat, shop or get a haircut. It is highly likely that they have become places you visit not just for the quality service but for the familiar, friendly faces you see and the fact that they already know what you need before you say a word. This kind of service not only sounds really nice but exists because everyone involved is keeping their promise to you. The business understands the promise it made to you, and it keeps its promise. And the business delivers for you.
When faced with facts and proof we expect a rational person to make an intelligent decision on what is better. But that does not always happen. People make decisions based on hope, fear, what others appear to be doing, and what they believe has worked in the past. Viral stories and shocking testimonies can trump detailed data. We see this with the anti-vax movement. Ultimately they believe that vaccines do not really work and have hurt more people than helped. There is no point having endless fact-based discussions. No amount of data will change their mind because "it's all fake and it all comes from big pharma". What's needed is a series of stories and testimonials from those in the group who have changed their minds. These mind changing stories need to be shouted. The ripple effect will begin. Over time more will change their minds. It may take a while but it will happen. The proof of it is that these days it's very hard to find people that still believe the earth is flat.
Most people think that you are showing your true colours when you are stressed and striving to meet a deadline, dealing with a serious problem at work, doing something that makes your question your moral code, suddenly find yourself in charge and have a chance to throw your weight around, get caught when you thought no-one could see you, get a chance to punish someone who has harmed you, or are completely crushed by your problems. This is when you need to tell your story. This is when people need to hear the truth about you.